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sprinting with box cutters

Sprinting with box cutters is REALLY where it’s at!

Are you sick of doing the same old dangerous shit that everyone tells you not to do? Looking for new, more dangerous shit to do? Boy, do I have an unsafe activity for you.

Like everyone else who is cool and not a total loser, I have been running with scissors for my entire life. However, it’s come to my attention that running with scissors just isn’t dangerous like it used to be! With the advent of safety scissors, the threat of cutting someone open while running with scissors has decreased greatly. LAME!!

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